When children are involved in a separation/divorce, shared parenting can be a big challenge for couples: managing schedules, pick-ups, outings… And even more so when the separation has not ended very well.MIAM Mediation has become one of the best alternatives for resolving conflicts in a safe space where both parties reach an agreement for the children.
In these sessions, the needs of the couple and their children are taken into account in an empathetic and pragmatic way, so that they can work together for the benefit of all.
What is family mediation?
In the UK, over 70% of cases using mediation reach satisfactory agreements, underlining its effectiveness as a tool for managing parental disagreements.
Family mediation is a voluntary process in which an impartial third party, the mediator, helps the parties involved to resolve conflicts collaboratively. In the context of shared parenting, it aims to facilitate agreements that prioritise the well-being of children and enable both parents to play an active role in their care.
The role of the mediator
The mediator listens, understands and resolves. He or she is one of the main protagonists in a mediator’s session. The mediator is the key figure who supports families in times of change, such as separation, divorce or family restructuring.
He/she helps to identify common interests and to explore creative solutions. He/she does not have the authority to impose decisions; his/her role is to guide parents towards mutually beneficial agreements.
Common issues addressed in mediation
- Visiting and living hours.
- Educational and medical decisions.
- Shared expenses related to parenting.
- Plans for holidays and special events.
- Resolution of future conflicts.
Preparing for co parenting mediation
Setting goals
First of all, ask yourself: What does my child really need? It is essential to have clear priorities before a mediation session in order to find the best solutions.
Gathering relevant documentation
Make sure you gather all the documentation that is needed for these processes, such as school calendars, medical reports. This will help to make informed decisions and look out for the best interests of the children.
Mediation does not guarantee that both parties will get everything they want, but seeks to create equitable agreements. Keeping an open mind is key to the success of the process.
How simple is the mediation process?
How do I find reputable Mediators near me? This is a very common question when looking for a quick solution to avoid court cases and further costs in a separation/divorce where there is a child/children involved.
That is why the mediation process is much shorter than traditional methods. It all starts with a session where the mediator introduces the rules, the objectives and the role that each party of the couple will have, establishing collaboration.
This is when the different points of view and concerns are presented. From that moment on, a co-parenting plan will be created where schedules, responsibilities and methods to resolve other conflicts that may arise in the future will be included.
Once an agreement is reached, the mediator documents all agreements that have been reached. These can be legally ratified if the parties so wish.
Benefits of parenting mediation
Mediation promotes decisions centred on the emotional, educational and social needs of children, reducing the negative impact of parental conflict. In addition, these services are much quicker and cheaper than court proceedings, saving up to 60% in costs.
Mediation encourages respectful dialogue, improving the relationship between parents and facilitating long-term collaboration.
Challenges during mediation and how to overcome them
During a divorce or separation with children, it is normal for some emotional tensions to arise. But that is what the mediator is there for. To help channel these emotions and keep the focus on the main objective: the well-being of the children.
